Thursday, March 22, 2012

Interview with Kim Olver

Kim Olver spends her life helping people get along better with the important people in their lives, including themselves, at home and at work. She is an author, licensed counselor, and life coach. Trained in Reality Therapy/Choice Theory since 1987, she teaches counselors, social workers, and teachers how to get more of what they want by taking control over the one thing they can control: their own behavior and
thinking.


What was your path towards publication like?
I took a class on the Internet from John Eggan's Mission Marketing Mentors program, designed to help aspiring authors publish and market their books and information products. It was a one-year program and I learned a lot about publishing.


What was the first market you queried and why did you choose that market?
The first market I queried was the business market interested in maximizing the benefits of a diverse workforce. I started with the business sector because I was advised they had a greater ability to pay for staff development which would provide me with the capital I needed to write my second book… in the area of self-development / relationships, Secrets of Happy Couples.


What is your biggest obstacle when it comes to pitching yourself as a writer and what steps have you taken to overcome that obstacle?
My biggest obstacle was thinking that pitching myself was somehow bragging about myself.

I believed I could pitch anyone else, but not myself. I got over that hump by realizing the information I offer in my books is powerful and if I don't pitch my books, then people can't benefit from the information. It's not about me personally, instead it's about helping my readers.

Can you tell us a little bit about your latest book?
Secrets of Happy Couples is different from other books of the same subject because it is based on one basic truth that all great relationships begin and end with yourself. Any relationship is the sum of its parts: individuals.

This book explores how you, as an individual, can make the difference and create a happy and fulfilling relationship with your partner. No other book has surveyed couples. I also interviewed prominent relationship experts and included their ideas in the book.

I formulate the Relationship Cycle, beginning in the Alone Stage, moving to the Getting Together Stage, on to the Compatibility Stage, to the Maintenance Stage, and then back to the Alone Stage. At least 50% of us will find ourselves alone again due to death, divorce or personal decision. I don't shy away from that fact; instead I provide tips and strategies to successfully navigate the grief of a lost relationship.

This book can help everyone improve their relationships because it focuses on what YOU can do as an individual to improve yourself, your love life and sex life.

This book contains seven (7) different exercises and quizzes including a Need Compatibility quiz, Rules of Engagement exercise, Steps for Recovery exercise and many more. If you would like to learn from couples who already know how to create the relationship of their dreams, then this book is for you.





If you could choose just one thing for your book to accomplish, what would it be?
I would love my book to be a NY Times Bestseller. If this were to happen, that would mean it reached lots of people and the readers are enjoying healthier, happier relationships with their significant other.


What is the message you hope your readers will get from reading your book?
I wrote my book hoping people, mainly women, would be empowered by taking control of the satisfaction they are experiencing in their relationships. So many of us, when discontent in our relationships, blame it on the other person, believing if their partner would just change, they could both be happy. It's not up to your partner to change when you are unhappy! You must realize there are things you can do on your own to increase your happiness in your relationship. Secrets of Happy Couples tells you how.


What is your best advice for getting past writer's block?
Write, just write. Even if you hate what you're writing, write anyway. The first draft of anything is just about getting it out of your head and onto the paper or computer. You can always pretty it up in subsequent drafts. Give yourself permission to write crap and the block will go away. Just write.


What was the best writing-related advice you ever received?
The best advice I ever received was about seeking peer review. When I get peer review, I often get additional information that makes my books better.

The author must be centered enough to be able to objectively review the peer information received. Some will be helpful and some will not. An author needs to discriminate and accept what is helpful and reject that which is not.


What do you feel is the single most detrimental thing a writer could do to destroy his/her career as a writer?
The worst thing a writer can do is to listen to the voice in his/her head saying, "You aren't good enough." All of us have limiting beliefs to overcome. When we give in to them, we never finish the book and if we do, we don't promote it properly. Know you deserve all the attention and recognition you seek. You have an important message that must be heard.


What's ahead for your writing?
I have a book on parenting in me and one on self-growth. I will likely work on the parenting one next.

You can learn more about Kim Olver at http://www.kimolver.com

Order Secrets of Happy Couples on Amazon.com


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